Happy Holidays!

Arrrgh! Half of my post mysteriously disappeared as I was trying to upload a picture. It bugs me that blogger does an auto-save and won't let you see the previous version before the save. There should be a way around this.

Anyway, dinner last night was a success. The final verdict on the chicken was not to cook it ahead of time. I rubbed the chicken with a mixture of olive oil, lemon, salt, black pepper, and finely grated garlic. I rubbed it in really hard and also made sure to get it all under the skin. Whole potatoes and carrots also went into the dish, covered with the same mixture minus the garlic. The lemon juice ensures the potatoes and carrots will preserve their color through the baking process. The whole thing was very delicious, and it must mean something when I say that because usually I am overly critical of my cooking. I could not find one thing that was wrong with this chicken (to my amazement he he) and people went for seconds so I think it was good. It was crispy on the outside and very juicy on the inside, falling right off the bone (although not falling off the bone as sometimes happens when I cook chicken in the slow cooker. That's a bit too much falling-off-the-bone for my taste, but I usually manage to overcook chicken in the slow cooker.) We also had bread, tomato-vermicelli soup, rice, and salad. I meant to take a picture of the chicken after it was done, but I forgot. We have some leftovers so maybe I'll try to take a picture tonight of our plates or something. Here's a picture of the salad:






It was a colorful addition to our table. I only use lemon juice, olive oil, and salt as dressing. It's lighter and also very easy to make. The dressing goes in right before we sit at the table, or else the whole thing becomes wilted and less appetizing to look at (if you make it more then an hour in advance that is). I also soak the lettuce (preferably romaine or frisee...I don't like iceberg lettuce that much, as it is crispy but doesn't have any flavor, it's like chewing hay..mmm but the nutty goodness of the frisee or the romaine...yum!Also the darker the color the better it is for you!) in a mixture of water and 2 tablespoons of white vinegar before I make the salad. I don't buy my lettuce prepackaged, so I feel this step is necessary. You wouldn't believe all the crap that falls into the water during this soaking process--very tiny green bugs that would be impossible to detect which mostly don't come off with the regular washing procedure, and a lot of fine brown hmmm earth/soil/sand/no-clue-what. You have to of course rinse the salad after this soak (and I rinse before, too). If you have slightly wilted lettuce, this procedure also restores it back to being good and crispy. I don't exactly know the chemistry behind that but it does help, try and see! Maybe it's just the water and the vinegar has nothing to do with it.

On another note, tomorrow is Christmas day. Everyone in the world is getting ready for some sort of celebration around this time of year, be it Christmas, Diwali, Kwanzaa, Yule, winter solstice, New Year celebrations, etc etc...It is a very festive time with lots of decorations, lot of colors, music, food, new hopes and desires waiting to be fulfilled. It is also the time of year when a lot of shopping happens with much stress and spending. As we officially enter the holiday season, I hope everyone takes a moment to reflect upon what it is that this season means to them, and looks beyond the whole shopping/gifts craze.

I wish you all a holiday season filled with happiness and joy, and Merry Christmas to all my christian friends.

Peace.

Dinner for six and other stories

I have people coming over for dinner tonight. We're going to be celebrating brother-in-law's girlfriend's graduation, and saying farewell to them for a few weeks as they're leaving for the holidays. I haven't got the menu totally figured out yet, but some sort of soup, a big salad, and I think some oven roasted chicken and rice will be on the table along with some good wine. A call to my mom is necessary as I need some tips on cooking the chicken-probably can manage on my own, but I want it to come out perfect...I will cook the chicken ahead of time, so I need a strategy to keep it moist and good for a second heat-up. Or maybe it's better to adjust the timing so that it's ready just as they get here? Hmmm...Also we're going to need some sort of dessert, haven't got that part figured out just yet.

Last night Mariachi and I finished "making" our Christmas presents for our parents. Photo albums with 100 pics in them depicting our 2009 together...With the explanations written on the margins... The albums themselves are really cute to look at even when empty but that wouldn't make a very meaningful gift. I hope they'll like them. Since we're so far away from each other, we (or rather I) thought this would be appreciated. Mariachi helped me get it all together by napping on the couch while I sorted and labeled the photos. Then we put them in the albums, and then I wrote the labels for both albums, because we (I) decided my hand writing is better (and because he didn't really want to do it heh). I forgot how much fun it was to look at photos in an album. We never have our pics printed, we just look at them on the computer screen and I realized last night that it's just not the same. BUT thinking about all the trees and ink we save by not getting the pics printed puts my mind at ease. Also, really, the albums are cool but you look at them 1 or 2 times and then they just sit there in a drawer or on a shelf...It's a different story with parents though, I'm sure they'll be looking at them more often ;).

I got Mariachi a yoga mat and we've been doing yoga together at nights. I'll spare you the details but he looks soooo funny when he does yoga. :D

And now, I have to plan out my menu, my day, and then call mom.

Oi!

Fell off the bandwagon again...Maybe this blogging thing is really not for me :S Things I've been doing lately, in no particular order:
-Obsessively cooking soup. Weather's finally gotten cold here...There's something so comforting about soup, especially on cold days...And the possibilities are endless. I love playing around and creating "new" stuff...If you know a few basics, you can't really mess up a soup.It's quick, cheap, and a wonderful "starter". (Side note: one should definitely peel a spaghetti squash before cooking and blending it...And the sucker is so hard to peel! Lesson learned:bake it, then scoop out the flesh...Otherwise you'll have some sort of weird "gritty" soup and a husband unwilling to eat it.)
-Learning French...intensively...I never thought I'd be able to do it, but, yup, I actually can speak French now...
-Making new friends...I've met so many wonderful people!
-Still not believing I am in Montreal...Maybe I keep repeating the same thing over and over again, but it's been 10 months since I moved here, and not a day goes by that this city doesn't amaze me. It really is one of the best places in the world to live, and really, the winter is not that unbearable, it's almost always sunny in the winter, and the summers are hot--at least we have that.
-Looking for a job--still
-Getting ready to adopt a (or two) cat(s)
-Doing laundry...Seriously, I have no clue what's up with that, but we seem to generate twice the normal amount of laundry lately!
-Unsuccessfully attempting to knit
-Getting ready to go on a skiing trip...So excited about this one, hope I'll come back in one piece!
-Researching "self-employment" alternatives
-Reading--Just finished reading Dan Brown's "The Lost Symbol". For me it was a quicker read than "The Da Vinci Code" but I hated the ending...Reading Kundera's "Farewell Waltz" right now. Probably one of his "lighter" works, but it is a good read so far.
-Working on academic papers
-Wanting a Kindle
-Thinking about blogging...

I registered for an intensive French course at the university. It's from 9 am to 3 pm every weekday for six weeks. I am so excited! YAY! The class begins on Sept. 13. I will have to take a placement test before then. Did I mention I am so excited? :))

Tales of Monkey Island...I am fantasizing about installing and playing it. I think I need to wait until we can get a new desktop computer, though, not sure if the "old" laptops will cut it.

If you're a Guybrush fan, then The Secret of Monkey Island Special Edition is out, too. It's pretty cool, they re-rendered the graphics and did a voice-over, and the music of course. The graphics kind of remind me of MI 3, which is my favorite in the series.

Nobody can claim they're a video game veteran unless they've played the Monkey Island game. It's a classic. (Or should I say they're all classics?)

Be careful what you say or write, people.

http://www.boingboing.net/2009/08/24/court-orders-google.html

This weekend just flew by...

well...I guess this is going to be my post today. Had a very nice day with Mariachi, reorganizing the living room. It looks much better now.

Whoa!

I just saw a man crossing the street and peeing at the same time! People were stopping to look at him but he just didn't seem to care. It was funny and weird at the same time.

Only 3 hours left for today to end, and I have nothing interesting to report...Actually I do have a lot of things I want to write about, but not tonight I guess, I'm not in the mood.

I've had this weird pain in my right leg for a while (I mean for at least a year regularly, and sporadically for maybe about 2-3 years), it seemed to come and go and I never thought anything of it, but it feels like it's stayed forever this time. It's in my knee, hip and big toe at the same time. I can barely walk in the mornings, then it sort of gets better. It still hurts, but it's not stiff, and it's mostly my foot/big toe/ball of foot that hurts. I jacked this ankle up really bad a few times in the past, and now I am wondering if it has anything to do with that. I also used to have these weird warm feelings in my leg, like someone was pouring hot water inside my leg or some kind of weird tingly feeling which I know is something to do with the nerves, but that hasn't happened for the past 8 months or so. I know I should stop being stubborn and go see a doctor. I thought maybe it would go away on it's own, but it looks like it's here to stay.

Reading stuff on the internet about your symptoms is pretty scary by the way. I could have a whole lot of conditions ranging from rheumatoid arthritis to a herniated disc. Or maybe nothing at all...

Yeah, see, when I said I'd blog everyday, I never said I'd write about cool interesting stuff. My life is so lame. :)

Random stuff

• Mariachi and I are totally into the TV show "Weeds". So into it that we watched 4.5 seasons in 2 weeks. My only relief is that they are only 28 min. long each (episodes not seasons). The first 3 seasons were the best.
• I love my travel hoop that I got from hoopnotica.com. It's so much fun hooping! And good for your abs and back, too. :)
• I lost 4 lbs. in a month and don't look like I'm pregnant anymore. Now if I could only lose 4 more...
• It's been so hot here the last few days yet I managed to get some kind of stomach flu or cold or something. I suspect the pool might be to blame. I feel much better today, though.
• In a weird way, I want it to be fall already.
• I suspect I might be the only person who thought all the butter in Julie&Julia was gross rather than yummy. I like butter, but not a whole pan of it I guess. I am sure the food was delicious though.
• I might be making "bœuf bourguignon" as per Mariachi's request...maybe...someday...one day...
• I am thinking of fantasizing about knitting a pencil skirt. That would be so warm and so much fun to wear...Maybe a maroon or deep burgundy color...Oh yeah...Should be easy on circular needles (I hope).
• I have an "herb garden" out in the balcony...It has mint, parsley, basil, lavender, oregano, and rosemary. Except for the lavender (which refuses to flower...but maybe I can use the leaves) I use them all regularly, and that makes me feel so good for some reason.
• Because of all the fascination with hand-made/home grown stuff, I sometimes feel like I live in the wrong era. I would have loved to have sheep that I can shear, make all the wool into roving, spin it, dye it, etc...I would have loved to lead a self-sustaining kind of life.
• But I love city life at the same time, and realized how much I missed it after I arrived in Montreal. You get exposed to so much stuff just by being here. So if I can't have the farm, I don't want anything in between. It has to be big and noisy...LOL. And I am trying to find ways to be self sustaining in a city, which is a challenge I like.
• Mariachi is obsessed with the new iPhone 3GS. They're out of stock in all the stores. This gives us a little more time to humanly converse when we're out. After that, it'll be like carrying a mini laptop with us. I find it annoying. Is there something wrong with me?
• I wish someone would offer me a job without applying. My fantasies have no boundaries.
• If you coat tofu in corn starch before frying it, it becomes so crunchy and delicious. I just learnt this a few days ago.
• I found myself spelling "harbor" as "harbour" the other day. How quickly our brains adapt to new things. I have no clue how it happened, but it just happened.
• I think trying to write a blog every day will be a fun challenge.

Why do I have a blog if I won't write???

Apparently I suck at this blogging thing. I have decided to keep myself accountable from now on. I want to write, I really do...

So here I am, pledging to publish a blog everyday, no matter how mundane and stupid my posts may be. Even if it's only a few words. Maybe the whole process will lead to some kind of weird self-enlightenment, or magically reveal what I really want to be when I grow up. (Probably not, but hey, it's worth a shot...)

Greetings from Montreal!

Bonjour!
I've been MIA for a long while, but now I am ready to get back to the blogging world-with a lot of interesting material under my belt, too, I assure you. The move to Montreal was smooth yet tiring. The following weeks after my move were pretty tiring, too, since we had to shop for furniture, unpack boxes as they arrived, settle down, etc. Then the wedding prep craze started, so uhm, yeah, actually now that I think about it, ever since I moved, things have been pretty hectic and exhausting, not to mention I had to finally write those damned journal papers for publishing (no they're not published yet, but I did write them).

Mariachi and I finally got married 13 days ago (July 10, woot woot!) and things have finally calmed down, and I feel very happy and not stressed, almost like everything in my life has come full circle or something, although it's very hard to explain what I feel. I've never been one to obsess about getting married (although I certainly was not against it), but after it's all said and done, I do feel different for some reason, and in a very good way. Maybe more on that later...

I finally gathered the courage to enroll in a yoga studio today, in an attempt to get in shape, because honestly, I find the whole chocolate/bakery/food scene in Montreal irresistible, and up until now I thought I had a strong will...It turns out it wasn't my will so much that stopped me from gaining weight but the OK-but-not-irresistible food. Especially the chocolate here, it tastes so light and heavenly it's dangerous (and addictive), and what better comfort food but a chocolate fondant with molten warm chocolate oozing from chocolate cake crevices onto your plate with every spoon stroke when it's -100000 degrees outside?! I say "gathered the courage" because for some reason I am overly conscious about going to an actual yoga studio here, where the classes are much smaller and personal than the classes I used to take at the YMCA, and the "teachers" are actual yogis who have trained with big shots and been to ashrams in India. I doubt these teachers will step out of the yoga session to teach ass-kicking kick-box where you hit "like you mean it" when they were guiding you through a nice mellow meditation about letting go 5 minutes ago. It will be an interesting experience, and hopefully a belly-shrinking one, too.

I am also working on my French, and started looking for a job, too. So far, Montreal has been so much more than I thought it would be, it's eclectic, modern, and bohemian at the same time. For now, there's no place else I'd rather be, and I guess that's all that matters.

27 days...

I have finally decided that February 22, Sunday, would be a good day for me to fly to Montreal. It's kind of scary how little progress I made on the packing front, but most of my big stuff (furniture) already have new owners. When they get picked up it will be easier for me to get in the mood to move, for now I just feel like I am not going anywhere at all. 27 days is a lot of days to take care of stuff, right? (I hope so!) Honestly, I am feeling pretty weird - weird combination of feelings that get me in the mood to do, well, mostly nothing.

First, there is the "guilt" that comes from actually not doing anything, as in "work" kind of stuff. I am supposedly working on my publications, but that doesn't feel like work (and I'm not getting paid, and I have no one breathing down my neck). I feel like I should be doing something, or going somewhere to get something done. I haven't been able to "relax and take it easy" or "have a break" since I finished the Ph.D., at least mentally, because of this constant nagging feeling that I am not being productive. Hopefully, this feeling will be replaced with relief once I settle in my new town and really start looking for a job. And in the mean time, as a way to calm down the "being productive" urge, I knit...It's a nice way to keep my mind occupied, feel like I am accomplishing something, and, turns out it's a great procrastination tool as well.

I am really looking forward to moving to Montreal, for a number of reasons, but the strongest one is probably the fact that I miss my fiance, whom I will be referring to as "el Mariachi" from now on, because honestly, I find the word "fiance" very pretentious, and impersonal. If I had my way, I'd still call him my boyfriend, but for the purposes of this blog, he shall henceforth be referred to as "el Mariachi" or maybe just "Mariachi"...Or maybe "Mari", since it's shorter and faster to type, but I need to think about that one a bit. After all this is my blog and he's my fiance, and I could call him whatever I want, and why would you care (he might care but I doubt he reads this blog...despite my numerous efforts to make him)? Anyway, the whole reason I mention that I miss Mari...achi, is that I don't wear my emotions on my sleeves like some people do, and I think from the outside it might look like I'm not in a hurry to go be with him, or don't miss him. The truth is I miss him very much, and it's really hard being apart from him, and I am really really looking forward to going there and being with him, but having a hard time expressing it out loud. I have always been a very reserved person, and I consider myself very challenged when it comes to expressing emotions. I feel awkward when I hear people say "you should go be with him...don't you miss him?", and because I feel awkward, my "yes of course I miss him" comes out as being not very convincing. So yeah, apart from the guilt of "not doing anything", I have this excitement that grows each day that I get closer to my tentative "moving" day, if anyone really needs to know (mom? are you reading???). I am also excited that I am moving to a bigger city, with a totally different culture and language. It is definitely time to move on if you feel like you have taken all that you can from one place, and feel you're getting dumber and wasting your time by staying planted there.

And third, I admit I feel very tired...I've been mentally very tired for some time now, but I also feel physically tired, and emptying/packing a whole apartment seems like a daunting task. This is the one and only reason I am not rushing to pack and move. And that gives me a little bit more time with my friends here.

Oi!

It seems that my avatar has gone bonkers, and all my attempts to fix it have been in vain. Until I find a way to fix it, you'll have to bear with my cat-loving, high-on-speed avatar who apparently is about to be kidnapped by pirates...*sigh*

Renaissance

Just another cold autumn night
Sitting here by the window, without you
Wishing you were here
Yet another time...

I was the feral cat
The wild mare
The bird desperately trying to flap away
With forever broken wings
Cool and collected
Independent...disconnected?
Self-sufficient...poser?

I died a thousand deaths before
Silent...cold...alone
Glad...
The same hands that stabbed me in the back
Buried me to never see the light again...
I existed, only through the veil of my fears.

Your lips were my renaissance
Vibrant colors that pierced through my monochrome
Music that heralded the coming of spring
You were my April that came in the middle of winter
Unexpected, fresh, and welcome
Full of life and warmth
Tender
You dug this shattered soul out
Fragile, like an ancient piece of china
And made it whole again.
Oh, but you are so wise,
You taught this little girl
It's alright to be loved and held again...
And to belong...

It was about time...
I am coming out to play.

© 2009 by Pinar

Change is good, eh?

I've been in sort of a denial about what's going on (or maybe I should say coming up) in my life, but I cannot run from it anymore, as I got a call from my landlord today asking if tomorrow noon was a good time to show my apartment to a prospective renter (whom I hope does not like to cook or daylight, given the fact that my kitchen is tiny and the apartment is dark like a cave most of the day. I think someone with vampirical (is that even a word?) tendencies would be the best candidate, but I digress...) I'm moving to Montreal, CA, in about a month, to be with my fiance, where he has a job, and I...don't. Hopefully that will be resolved once I stop this denial thing, and get my bum over there, and actually start looking. But for now, I am stuck in this vicious cycle of "purging" my belongings, which mostly goes like this: Take something out of the cupboard, bookshelf, wardrobe...Look at it lovingly, caress it, think about how much I like it (even though I had no clue it existed until that very moment), try to decide whether it goes in the "recycle", "trash", or "donate" pile, then decide it's a keeper. So in reality, I am not purging as much as I am making piles of "keepers", which sort of creates areas of walking hazard all over the apartment, because I tend to trip over things very frequently. (Ask my fiance if you don't believe me. It's a miracle I haven't tripped over the internet cable that goes from the living room to the bedroom yet. But that can change...Just you wait.)

Unfortunately, the whole tripping thing poses a big threat, as my right foot ankle is already messed up from too many traumas in the past (not tripping related), and my health insurance just expired, and I haven't renewed it because I am here for just another month or so. I know that is dumb, but it was either renew it for at least 5 more months, or call them to figure out how to do it for just a month. Given the fact that they barely pay for anything that could happen here in the U.S., I doubt they would pay for anything that could happen in Canada, so renewing for 5 months was even dumber if you ask me. Anyhow, I am just keeping my fingers crossed that I won't have any "accidents" in the few more weeks that I am here, and also hoping that the pain I am currently experiencing with my big toe and constant dizziness will all go away on their own.

A lot of things happened during the period I was not blogging. I "defended" my dissertation, and finally became a Ph.D. I got engaged on Thanksgiving night 2008. And now I am moving to Montreal. I must admit that I am pretty excited, except a little sad because I have to leave so many friends behind (and the aforementioned "keepers"...There's just no way I can take everything with me. Or so I keep telling myself.)

I have decided to clean the blog up a little bit, mostly get rid of the political stuff. Given my frustration with how things are in general, I think this change will be good for me. I've always liked "beginnings" (frankly, I don't understand why we say "new beginnings", because there can't be an "old beginning" can there???), so I hope this one, like the ones before, will give me a chance to meet new people, and equip me with better tools to deal with this thing called life (because changes do that). But honestly, above everything else, I look forward to being united with my fiance again, and starting a new life together from scratch. How cool is that?